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Today I was talking to a coworker about my carbonated water kick, and how I like to use it as a  tactic to fill my stomach up before meals to stop myself from overeating. This reminded me of a conversation I had with a friend last night about how she brushes her teeth a few hours before bedtime so that she doesn’t do any late night snacking (which I think is a great idea, but wouldn’t stop me a bit. I wouldn’t be opposed to brushing my teeth twice in a night if the snacking bug bit me, but to each his own)!

There are different tools we all have to use to keep up the good fight. So, today I’d like to hear what yours are. Maybe they are just weird ones you’ve heard about that you don’t actually use but you found to be really weird, or maybe you’ve found something that actually works. I’ll go first- I recall a few years ago a friend told me to drink hot tea after every meal (that’s why Europeans are so slim, she said), because they drink tea, and the hot tea pushes all the fat from your meal out of your body. Now I was leerie about this becuase it seems as though if it were that easy, everyone would be drinking tea. Also it just doesn’t seem to jive with everyting I’ve ever learned about digestion, but what do I know? I just started wearing waistbands a year ago!

What’s in your “bag of tricks?”

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It doesn’t get much better than how I feel right now. I’m home on my computer, nibbling on spaghetti squash and sipping on seltzer, after a glorious day at work (yeah I’m not kidding), a weightlifting class at the gym, some sweaty cardio, and a successful day two of a 9 day “detox” cleanse. I feel very refreshed already! I was even out at a few bars last night, drinking only seltzer water and ordered a yummy salad. This makes me feel proud and strong. Mentally strong, which is key to maintaining my weight! If I can survive hanging at a bar without drinking, I can accomplish anything.

This cleanse I”m doing right now is essentially the first 9 days from Phase 1 the Fat Smash diet, but I’m including a few extra items like nuts and tofu and eggs so that I can get sufficient protein for all the fabulous weightlifting that I’m doing. I’ve blogged about this before and I will be tracking my food intake in my next blog entry. My body had been feeling sluggish and over-fed lately, so I chose the fat smash as a way to refresh my body and remind myself I don’t need all the bad items I’ve been consuming!

In the next few days I want to try to make a special juice or a smoothie, after a trip to the grocery store. My cousin Beth gave me this link yesterday that I most definitely plan to utilize http://www.krystaslifeinfood.com/2011/12/detoxifying-juices-and-smoothies.html I am dying to try the “Green Machine Smoothie.” The vibrant colors of these smoothies makes my mouth water.

Speaking of water, I have an insane obsession with bubbly water. Any kind of bubbly water, I don’t discriminate. I gots love for all water with bubbles. I like flavors, mineral, Pelligrino, Perrier, Poland Spring Lime, and those cool vintage blue bottles. I like it here, I like it there, I really like it, everywhere. Bubbly water does magical things. The bubbles fill my stomach and stop me from eating all day long, and slow me down at mealtime, too. A glass of seltzer before a meal and WOWZA the amount of calories I consume in a meal are significantly lower. I’ll have to conduct a study one day. 

I have a friend who is also in love with bubbly water. She shall remain anonymous and is also on a weight loss journey. She is an impressive woman who has done everything right. She’s moderately lost her weight slowly, methodically, and appropriately. I envy her weight loss path because she’s not had such peaks and valleys like I have- because she hasn’t demanded immediate gratification. She has promised to guest blog when she reaches her weight loss goal, but for now I need to tell a little funny story that she told me. It hit very close to home- and I can guarantee every woman has done this before. She was at the gym getting changed, and stepped in front of the mirror. She’s just starting to feel the skinny girl urge to pick apart her problem parts, now that she can see where they are. She started grabbing at chunks of flesh she wished weren’t there, as if she could grab it by the handfull and rip it off. She thought she was alone but a woman was there and, not surprisingly, looked very confused. But I’m not confused about this situation one bit- been there, done that (though not in a locker room…I keep that under wraps!!) If I witnessed that, I’d have high fived her and told her to keep on trucking (or possibly would have told her to grope herself in private). Wouldn’t it be fabulous if all it took was a little grab at the inner thigh and it was gone??? 

Until I can tear these thighs away, I am all about squats and my bubbly water. 

Can’t wait for mystery woman to hit her goal and share some photos with everyone!! She’s so very close. 

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Ladies, why? Why does this have to happen? What did I do to deserve this terrible bloat? I’ve tried to be a good person yet I am still punished. Clearly not that good. I shall consider this my regular lump of coal in response to 20 years of misbehaving when nobody is looking.

Periods suck. Period. Suck the life right out of you.  And don’t even get me started on the downward emotional spiral that occurs if I weight myself during this time. I’ve heard the scale can tip up to 6 pounds!! Yep, that’s where I’m at right now. It is toying with my head, my gut, and my emotions!

Brings me back to 5th grade health class when we were learning about “The changes our bodies will be going through” and our little pamphlets taught us that working out will help with the symptoms. I remember thinking to myself “when I am a woman, I’m going to work out all the time so I don’t get any of that.” Well my health teacher done lied to me, because:

1. I don’t want to do anything when I am bloated except feel bad for myself. Also, I feel sleepy. What do I do about my droopy eyelids?
2. If and when I do get up to work out during this time, a good run doesn’t take any of my cramps away, or the bloat for that matter. It might make me less pissed about the entire situation, so I will give the health teachers of the world that point.

Maybe you ladies can help me with my debate. I’ve ALWAYS been taught that water helps with bloating. The more water you drink, the easier water can be flushed out of your body and get rid of this terrible sloshy brick in your gut. My coach (male, I must add) says that while I have my period, I should drink less water so my body doesn’t carry as much. Have I been wrong all this time? Does anyone want to “weigh” in on this for me?

BLOATED WOMAN, OUT.

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I find the new year refreshing. It really is an amazing way to restart and create a new life for yourself. Now the only issue is with this is that you are left to jump off from where you finished in 2011. What I mean by this is- you say you want to be fit in 2012? You’re going to have to struggle for a while at the gym before you become fit. You say you want to be financially sound in 2012? Well, you are going to have to pinch pennies to get out of the hole before you can get your head above water. While 2012 has endless possibilities, we are still leftover with 2011′s cruddy decisions. And believe it, I can feel that 2011 crud.

As far as today’s post goes, I’m not just thinking about weight loss. I’m thinking about my whole life. Trying to put everything in perspective, which actually helps with my weight loss, but that is not my main concern at this point- for once in quite some time. I’ve given up alcohol at least until my marathon in June, for many reasons which have surprisingly little to do with my weight loss journey. I’ve been re-evaluating my life lately and it’s time to get everything under control.  When I feel at ease with my life is when I can really take the time to focus on taking care of everything I need to take care of.

I have blogged before about how drinking can take over an entire weekend, stopping me from hitting the gym, running, eating healthy foods, sightseeing, volunteering, job searching, anything positive! So I have promised myself that I will keep my promises in 2012, and one of these promises is to make more time to do better things. It’s that simple. When I am faced with every day decisions, I will do the “better” thing. Should I party on Friday night or go to bed early to volunteer Saturday morning? BAM- done, hitting the hay early, it is! As an aside, I am starting on Sunday to volunteer at the Humane Society! I can’t wait to start. And I know that making right decisions will help with my weight maintenance. See the above example. If I’m not out partying, I wont be drinking and consuming calories, won’t oversleep, and won’t miss out on all the positive things I can accomplish that day.

Now this doesn’t mean I won’t be having fun. You can’t stop this girl from having a good time. I’ve just been very reflective lately and want to start doing right by myself. For my mind, body, and soul. Note I am writing this at 10pm on a Friday night. If you’re reading this at the same time, you feel me, right? LOL. Jersey Shore is on, and you KNOW that is a good decision.

I’m reflecting on what my long-term goals are. Coincidentally, I was on the elliptical the other day at the gym, my GOLDS GYM (shout out!) and saw a Gold’s Gym commercial that was talking about using short-term tactics to achieve long-term goals. Of course, with the new year and the new lifestyle I’m trying to lead, I thought long and hard about this. And again, it’s not just about fitness! It really made me think. For this blog’s purposes, I do want to focus on the health and fitness aspects of this concept. Sometimes long-term goals can seem so cumbersome, unattainable, and impossible. Like losing 100 pounds or running a marathon, or even for some people, just getting in shape. But they can transform into realistic achievable goals if you use short term tactics to achieve them. Remind yourself of this when you think that losing all the weight you want to lose is just too hard to think about. Break it down. Don’t think about those 100 pounds. Use a short-term tactic to get your journey underway. Try to swim 3 times a week, cut soda out of your diet, take the stairs every day, walk to work, stop eating fast food. Just use short-term, pointed tactics to achieve the seemingly impossible long-term goal.

Likewise, I will be doing the same in my personal life. Example: I need to finish grad school. It just seems like such a huge undertaking, but I need to think about the small things I need to do to get this done. Like, find a school I want to go to (how about that for a concept!), brace myself for more student loans, and get my paperwork together. Then, take one class at a time. One assignment at a time.

2012 is just so exciting. I am glad that 2011 died an ugly death. This new start is just what I needed. What is my readers promising to themselves in 2012??

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I was just getting back into my groove during the holidays, even walking in to work in the cold in the mornings again. This particular morning in mid-December was a fabulous one. My sister and I walked in to work- I believe I was so exuberant that I broke out into song at one point (I tell you, I can’t make this stuff up). I got to work and was feeling good. I ate my oatmeal for breakfast, had worked out the night before, and had all my workout gear for the day! Totally on top of the world.

I got to work and saw the cleaning lady (CL) in the hall way, whose company I usually enjoy, or at least I did until that day. Our exchange went a little something like this:

• Me: Good Morning! How are you today?
• CL: Good, good, and how are you?
• Me: I am great! I’m just ready for the holidays!
• CL: I see…
• Me: Oh, what do you mean by that??
• CL: <motions to her hips> You’re spreading.
• Me: WHAT?
• CL: You gotta trim it down, honey.
• Me: <Stunned, shocked>

I shot her a death stare, said nothing, and walked away as fast as I could. I headed back to my desk and cried for 20 minutes. I tell you, I am no cry-er. I don’t like to cry, and generally I don’t see a point in it at all. Tis for the weak!! But, I was completely overcome with emotion. Now, in her defense, I had gained a little weight. But, every being with a pulse understands that, while it is perfectly acceptable to tell women that they’ve lost weight and look fabulous, you need to keep your mother freaking mouth shut when you notice that a little extra poundage has crept back on. What I wanted to say back was something that I can’t even type here. I wouldn’t even want people to know what I was ABOUT to say. She is not a small woman, lets leave it at that. But I wouldn’t stoop to this level.

This got me to thinking, though, if it is acceptable to tell someone how fabulous they look when they are losing weight (she had referred to me as Barbie for a while), is it okay for them to “encourage” the same person by noting their weight gain? I mean, she was a big cheerleader of mine when I was losing. Do I have the right to be angry, or is this a double standard? At this point, I am still too emotionally invested to tell. And I can’t be mature about it. I haven’t seen her since, but I still feel like I might scream “SPREAD THIS” in her face the next time I see her. I’m trying my best to retain some kind of professionalism, here!

I’ve realized that I tie my weight to my happiness. No matter how hard I try, this happens. It shouldn’t. It’s not wise and I know better but I can’t stop. So I do know that CL saying this to me meant-to me-that I have failed (or am failing) in my weight struggle, even though I am not. I’m awesome. I look awesome, and I even feel awesome (99% of the time). I do know this deep down. But I see things on me that I knew looked better a few months ago and I want to get back to that body. But even then, I know that a few months ago I wasn’t completely happy with what I looked like. I guess it’s one of the joys of being a woman? Never being happy.

I had a chat with my new Coach the other day, and I told him about this feeling. We had a nice heart to heart and I started to explain to him how when I was bigger I was unhappy but never so nitpicky. I was able to accept that I was big and move on, whereas now I can find little things and obsess over them. He informed me that this was what skinny girls do. And I had a  few responses to this:

1. I’m a skinny girl. I need to remember this.
2. I always talked trash about smaller women complaining about their bodies but now I can totally relate. They see their imperfections just like everyone else does.
3. Refer to #1. Freaking enjoy it, Gina, you’ve worked damn hard.

I’ve talked about this before, but like my friend Kate just pointed out to me, weight loss has peaks and valleys. So do my emotions. The key is just to not let the cleaning ladies of the world let me feel so down on myself that I spiral back to 200 pounds. And I know over this journey I have become strong enough to let myself cry and then get it out at the gym.

But I can’t say for sure what I’ll do when I see CL again. Steer clear.

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The night I hurt my foot I started getting really sad. In the back of my mind I felt like I was done running forever and I would start balooning up in weight and that would be the end of wearing waistbands. I had nightmares of my “svelte” body morphing into the Snapple Lady. I mean, if I couldn’t work out, what would I do? I didn’t know where to turn.

One of the major offenses in life I am guilty of is not sticking to my promises and seeing things to their conclusion. I’ll admit this to anyone and have made it a resolution to stick to things more (like this blog). The thought of me not being able to finish this marathon really pissed me off to no end, because it was yet another promise to myself I felt like I couldn’t keep. However, this time, I had no control over it. This was the number one reason why my injury hurt me so much. It wasn’t the physical pain, it was the thought of not being able to achieve the goal I knew I could have otherwise achieved.

So that night, I did my second favorite thing after working out, DRINK. I mean, I was laying off the drinking because it was affecting my workout regimen. If I couldn’t work out, I figured I may as well drink. Plus alcohol temporarily heals wounds….< I am still human, you know>….But drinking always leads to hangover food, which leads to more eating….y’all know the drill. And, like I mentioned before, I was used to consuming 2000 or so calories to keep up with my weightlifting and running. So my body still felt like it needed this many calories. I kept my rockstar partying up for a few weeks, to forget my sadness. But I still wore my orthodics and slept with my boot on. (How rockstar are ORTHODICS!)

About 2 weeks before I left for Cancun (2.5 weeks after the injury), I got back into my groove, minus the running, but also kept drinking. I replaced running with biking and kept going with my weights. My eating was back on track, as well. I can’t believe I’m about to do this, but in the interest of full disclosure, here’s a pic I took the day before I left for Cancun….

That’s it. That’s me. MY SOUL HAS BEEN BARED, and so has my stomach. So needless to say, I went to Cancun feeling better than I had a year before- like, NOT 200 pounds, YIPPEE–, but feeling not as fabulous as I wished I would have (because I was still drinking to dull my emotional plantar pain, lets say). This was, afterall, the trip I won for my weight loss. In this picture I weigh 145 pounds. I put on some substantial weight in muscle up to this point (and yes there is still a lot of curve on that body, for which I am very lucky to have).

When I arrived in Cancun, the resort was amazing, and all-inclusive. For those of you who don’t know, all-inclusive is the Old-English term for “gluttonous drunken disgusting mess.” Nuff said about Cancun. However, between drinking and hangovers, I managed to use the elliptical every morning and still weight-lifted! 

Insert Corona Ad Here:

This was toward the end of the trip, so I’d say I’m about 150 lbs here.

The gluttony spilled over into the weeks after Cancun, when I went to Buffalo for Thanksgiving and my mom commented, “wow I haven’t seen you eat like this in a long time” (yes I’m sure Martha will be freaking out that I wrote this in here). However, she had a right to say it. I was still eating as though I was training for a marathon….

I did start up running again just after Cancun and kept my running and weightlifting up through my trip to Buffalo and until I went to Jamaica, becuase I knew I wanted to at least finish the half marathon no matter what.

Yes, I had an amazing last few months, I can’t deny this. I experienced amazing things, but now I can see those experiences on my ass!

So I got back from Jamaica, and after the half marathon I have been completely resting my foot from running for what has been over a month. My very intense weightlifting regimen started back up 3 weeks ago and I weigh 153 currently. Most of that is solid muscle but I have a little layer of vacation fat that I have been blasting. I’m spinning, eating right, and weightlifting. Last week I started up running, trepidatiously, for one mile, and had NO foot pain whatsoever. I feel like I am back and very happy.

SO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS?! I am going to train for my next marathon. I have tentatively set the date for June 10, Lake Placid. This gives me 22 weeks to slowly train and increase mileage, while I decrease my ass.

Plantar fasciitis occurs when the thick band of tissue on the bottom of the foot is overstretched or overused. This can be painful and make walking more difficult.

It was a beautiful warm day in October, about 11 weeks into my training schedule, when I set out for a short 5 mile run. The farthest run I had done to date was 16 miles, which I had completed about 4 days before. I wasn’t sore at all. After my 16 mile run, I felt like I could have run 10 more. It was the best shape I’d ever been in- my endurance had been tested and passed- I was running 30 miles per week with no soreness or any other issues. I even did two days of cross training on my bicycle. My muscles were incredibly strong. I was weighlifting 5 days a week. A rotation of legs, back, biceps, triceps, shoulders and chest. My nutrition was on point. I was eating plenty of proteins, lean meats, fruits, vegetables. I wasn’t drinking and was so focused I could smell the marathon 8 weeks away.

I had finally found a workout that I absolutely loved and wanted to stick to. My goal was realistically timed, and everything was falling into place for me to run 26.2 miles on December 3, and finish it like the strong woman I was. I was running all over town in the weeks prior. Running put me in a happy and healthy place. I really felt like this was my secret, my key. My key to health that I actually enjoyed doing.

So, back to this beautiful warm day in October. I put on my running shorts and headed out the door- ran all the way to Chinatown and turned around near Busboys and Poets. A few strides after the turnaround, it happened without warning. I landed on my left foot and it felt like it exploded. The pain was unbearable. So much so that I collapsed on the diewalk and immediately took my shoe off to investigate. Everything looked normal, not even swolen at all! It only hurt when I put pressure on it.  So I (very stupidly) hobbled home and made a doctors appointment for the next day.

Plantar Fasciitis was my diagnosis.

According to the ADAM Medical Encyclopedia:

 

 

You’re damn right it was painful, and you’re damn right it made everything more difficult. Not only was running impossible, but I couldn’t weight lift, could barely walk, OK basically couldn’t do ANYTHING without it hurting. I felt literally broken. Everything I had been training for was ripped away from me, my power was stolen somehow. Not only that, but I had been consuming enough calories to keep me running 30 miles a week and weight train every day, so it took quite some time to realign my caloric intake to my new sedentary life. I gained weight, felt mushy, and felt just overall….shitty….My new coach says this is normal for sports injuries. I have to say I actually felt kinda cool that I was sporty enough to have a sports injury!

I did exactly what the doctor told me for two weeks. I stayed off the foot, got orthodics, taped up my foot, and slept with a special boot on my foot (just as sexy as it sounds). Slowly, I started running again about 3 weeks later. Doc said to take at least 2 weeks off, and even once I started running again, to start at 3 miles and only increase my mileage by 10% per week. Yes, by those calculations I knew I wouldn’t complete the full marathon. It was a frustrating feeling, to know that my body was so capable but a small stupid BAND OF TISSUE was going to hold me back. Well, temporarily anyway. So I started running again and eventually got myself back up to half-marathon readiness. I finished the Reggae Half Marathon (in lots of pain) and have been resting my foot from running up until a week ago when I started running again. This time only one mile at a time.

The last month was difficult. I was forced to admit that I am human and have to work through injuries and pain. I am all to familiar with dealing with the weight loss aspect, but who would have thought I was “overtrained”!!

 

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I set out on a lofty journey to run 26.2 miles, and landed at 13.1 miles. I’m proud to say I accomplished that much, but not too proud to say I will need to try again for the 26.2 very soon. I will go into significant detail about the months leading up to the race in my next few blogs- this week will be a recap of all things training and vacationing that have brought me into the fabulous 2012! For today, I bring to you my Reggae Marathon recap! Pardon all the exclamation points. I was temporarily reminded of the beaches of Jamaica as I typed…got a little too excited.

I arrived in Negril two days before the race, having already planned to run just the half-marathon. I felt confident because I knew my body was capable of running this distance, but very nervous that my plantar fasciitis would attack me mid-race. (Anyone who has had plantar knows that “attack” is a very appropriate word).

The race started at 5:15am on Saturday, meaning I had to wake up at 3am to eat breakfast – a Shakeology Shake blended with peanut butter and banana, load my belt with gu and a water bottle,  and catch the 4am shuttle to the race start. The shuttle was cramped but everyone was so cheerful. Each person who entered said hello or good morning as they walked in. People just don’t do that in Washington, DC. At least people who aren’t running for office, anyway!!

We arrived to the race start and the reggae was already pumping. I knew that even if I was in pain, this was going to be the best experience ever. And it was! I had taken a few pain pills before the race, in case of any flare-ups, but when I arrived and smelled the “medicinal marijuana” in the air, something told me I might feel no pain…..

The sky was dark and tiki torches led the way the first few hundred feet. Some Bob Marley tunes started us off on our way, and locals were all along the start, cheering us on. I felt like I do at the beginning of every race- excited, nervous, spry, and curious as to why I do this to myself?

Before the race we were promised reggae music at every mile. We got that, and more!  Between mile markers, cars were pulled over at the side of the road with speakers blasting tailor-made reggae music “Reggae Marathon, catch me if you can. Everybody wants to be a winner, nobody wants to be a loser,” was the chorus of one song. I heard that and thought, is there no middle ground? I just want to survive this!

We were also provided water every mile, in the form of pouches that required the use of fangs to bite into to get water. These were both tricky and dangerous.  You bite too much off and you are drenched in water. You dont bite enough and you are using all your air to suck this miniscule hole for water. But alas, it was added entertainment during what ended up being a 2:35 race for me. The danger came when the pouches were tossed on the road unfinished (especially in the dark). I was forced to play little games of hopscotch to avoid them.

The sun came out soon enough and I was already well on my way. I was running 2 miles and walking 30 seconds, as I had practiced, and was feeling great until around mile 7 when my foot started to REALLY hurt me. I knew I wasn’t going to stop, so I switched my walking cycle to walk 30-60 seconds every mile for a few more miles. I took time to smell the air (combination of garbage, ganga, and the caribbean sea) and chat with others that were walking around me. I even snapped some photos of myself. At mile 10 I felt ready to just be rid of the pain and, as crazy as it sounds, ran the next two miles. It was at mile 12, Bob’s Mile, that I walked and enjoyed his inspiring music quotes at the side of the road:

It was here where I cried. I was completely overcome with emotion. Everything I’ve felt throughout this weight loss journey came over me. I was proud of what I’ve accomplished in the last year. From 200 pounds to a half marathon was no easy task. Even though I didn’t complete the full marathon, even allowing myself to consider running such a distance meant that I have fundamentally changed as a person. I felt powerful. Strong enough to push through the pain I was feeling to run 13.1 miles. I felt happy! Happy to just be almost finished. I felt beautiful. Sweaty, puffy, swolen eyes and body and all. My body might not look exactly how I want it to. My legs aren’t as skinny as I’d like. But damnit they are powerhouses. They are thick, strong, running and weightlifting machines. I am straight up cock diesel. I have trained my body to do what I want it to do, no matter what my (insanely unrealistic) ideals may be. I tried not to allow any disappointment to come through, but it did. I used that opportunity to think about all the marathons I can run someday after I give myself time to heal, and how much more accomplished I will feel after having been “injured” and beating it. In typical Gina fashion, I had to think about what I would accomplish next.

But first thing was first, I needed to cross the finish line. And I paid homage to Usain Bolt on my way in!

I crossed the finish line at 2:35, right at the middle of the pack, cried my eyes out with happiness and got a free Red Stripe! My family was waiting for me at the end and we enjoyed a fabulous hobble back to the hotel along the beach.

You see those legs? You could bounce a quarter off those legs. Well okay maybe just a dime!

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I’ve been Forest Gumping all over DC. Just running and running and running. At first I thought that running was my time to “think”, but then I realized, I don’t think at all when I run. My brain is clear. What a feeling that is. Maybe it’s because when I’m running, my body thinks it’s dying…. Like right before you die, when everything becomes clear. Actually, I did have this near-death feeling once before. In the snowy hills of Buffalo on my way to go skiing when I came face-to-face with a 2-story Thruway plow coming towards me on a two-lane windy road. Definitely thought I was a gone-er then, and all I thought to myself was “ok, this is it. You’re dead.”  But I lived, so now I can do anything!

But when I run, I don’t feel near death at all. So cliche- but I do feel more alive. Actually, I feel very sexy when I run. Something about sweat turning to salt on my skin and my eyeliner running down my cheeks that really makes me feel awesome. As every mile passes, I feel more empowered. I feel like Kanye–harder, better, faster, stronger. Or like Britney–stronger than yesterday. 

I have been using Hal Higdon’s Novice #1 Marathon Training Guide.  It’s an 18 week program and I am on week 7 right now. This means that I will be running 12 miles this upcoming Saturday. The most I’ve run is 10 miles at once.

Marathon Training Schedule: Novice 1

Week	Mon	Tue	Wed	Thur	Fri	Sat	Sun
1	Rest	3 m run	3 m run	3 m run	Rest	6	cross
2	Rest	3 m run	3 m run	3 m run	Rest	7	cross
3	Rest	3 m run	4 m run	3 m run	Rest	5	cross
4	Rest	3 m run	4 m run	3 m run	Rest	9	cross
5	Rest	3 m run	5 m run	3 m run	Rest	10	cross
6	Rest	3 m run	5 m run	3 m run	Rest	7	cross
7	Rest	3 m run	6 m run	3 m run	Rest	12	cross
8	Rest	3 m run	6 m run	3 m run	Rest	Rest	Half Marathon
9	Rest	3 m run	7 m run	4 m run	Rest	10	cross
10	Rest	3 m run	7 m run	4 m run	Rest	15	cross
11	Rest	4 m run	8 m run	4 m run	Rest	16	cross
12	Rest	4 m run	8 m run	5 m run	Rest	12	cross
13	Rest	4 m run	9 m run	5 m run	Rest	18	cross
14	Rest	5 m run	9 m run	5 m run	Rest	14	cross
15	Rest	5 m run	10 m run	5 m run	Rest	20	cross
16	Rest	5 m run	8 m run	4 m run	Rest	12	cross
17	Rest	4 m run	6 m run	3 m run	Rest	8	cross
18	Rest	3 m run	4 m run	2 m run	Rest	Rest	Marathon

This also means that I have a half marathon in 2 weeks. I will be running in the Hidden Treasures Half Marathon on September 25. 13.1 miles baby. Sock it to me.  I’m following the above plan for the most part. I’m running all the miles I should, just tweaking the days here and there when I need to (like when I actually want to have a life, which luckily isn’t often). I am weightlifting 4-5 days a week, and cross training more than I should (5-6 days/week). My cross training is swimming and cycling. BECAUSE, I signed up for a triathlon on October 1. An Olympic triathlon. The only part of this that scares me is the biking. Because, a triathlon is 3 parts (TRI, get it?)

1. Swimming- Hey, as long as it’s not in the Potomac, with dead bodies, I’m happy. This one is in a lake, and it’s only 1 mile.
2. Biking- 26 miles. Not terrible, but I currently ride a cruiser, with no gears. I did it for my last triathlon but it was not fun. Thank goodness I am not easily embarrassed. Literally everyone who passed me had something to say…oh, and literally EVERYONE passed me.
3. Running- ain’t no thang. 10K. I can do that. That’s one of my “short runs” now.   Yep, that’s my bike. Bonus- it has a bottle opener on the side.

 

So, I’m working hard. Cancun is 7 weeks away, and the marathon is 11 weeks away.  Besides the running, I have an interim goal of dropping my body fat to below 20%. Right now I’m around 24%. Not where I want it to be, and I think the lower body fat will really help with my running. To accomplish this, I am pairing my workouts with yoga and a cleanse-of-sorts. I’ve cut out all beverages besides water and Shakeology shakes. I eat Gu during my long runs.  I’m loading up on fruits, veggies, and protein from nuts, beans, tofu.

It’s not easy and it’s not always fun, but I always feel accomplished. Even on days when I have a half-assed workout, I remember that I used to weigh 200 pounds, damn it, and one year ago I never would have believed that I would become this person. I even looked at my earlier blogs to verify. I did poke fun (longlingly) at those who feel sad when they miss the gym. That’s me now. I’m Kanye, Britney, and Forest Gump. And I ROCK the pavement of DC. (oh and I’m dramatic)…

 

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Body Image is always my battle. At 200 lbs, at 130 lbs, and everywhere in between. I realize I beat myself up a lot, and I cant figure out how to stop. Not sure what the cure is. I find it interesting though- I am very accepting of other people’s curves, but have problems with my own.

A couple nights ago I wanted to get a better picture of what someone else my size looks like, so I could determine whether they looked big or not. (Wow, when I type this out, it actually does sound very insane, but in the interest of raw blogging, I am being as honest as possible.) In my google results popped the below website:

http://kateharding.net/bmi-illustrated/

I LOVE IT!! It is women’s photos (some men, too, and one cat), along with their height, weight, and BMI result. Not only was this eye-opening but it just plain made me feel GREAT! Proof that women carry their weight in all different places. You could never in a million years guess what each woman weighs- let alone whether or not she would have registered as “overweight,” “normal,” or “underweight”. I just love it! Actually, after a while I stopped even paying attention to their weights and was just looking at all the fun things these women were doing in their pictures!

This website is food for thought. Why is it so easy for me to accept others but so hard for me to accept myself? (yes, posing self-questions is so Carrie Bradshaw of me!) When I’m heavy, I don’t like any part of my body, and when I’m thinner, I do spot checks on what I don’t like. Just plain old mean I am, to myself.

I cannot be the only one who feels this way. I know we all beat ourselves up. Actually, if you click on the above link and read all the comments, you will see many many comments on how people actually feel about their own weight, other’s weight, and body image.

I find my entire journey so exciting. Up until a year ago I never would have ever discussed weight. I felt so big that I never even wanted to talk about it. I ignored my size and hoped it would all go away, and it never did.  I hoped that the way it made me feel would go away, and it never did. And I am working every day on feeling good about the size I am (which is currently an 8, 150 pounts, thank you.)  I’m happy I’ve allowed everyone into my journey. There are ups and downs, but ultimately I feel empowered by being able to share every bit of it with you.

That’s not to say that it is always positive. Like I said…ups and downs…. now I give you a story about the DOWN SIDE to making my weight loss journey an open book. People feel as though they can let me know that I have gained a few pounds. Thanks people. I know. I feel every bit of it. Throughout my weight loss there was someone at my office who cheered me on the whole way. She even referred to me as Barbie at one point. Which I giggled at- mostly because that’s not even close. Barbie is ridiculous and I wouldn’t even want to look like her, BUT she meant well. Alas, this morning I saw my old friend and she  looked me up and down and disapprovingly asked, “You still working out?” when I said yes she tilted her head, gave me a look like she didn’t believe me and said “yeah, I’m watching you….” Well, she caught me at the wrong time. My response? “GO AHEAD AND WATCH!” Very mature, right? Right. But it temporarily made me feel better. What was I supposed to say?

I emailed Joy to tell her this exact story and she responded with:

“You don’t look bigger and even if she thinks you do you work harder than anyone I know and you make me work harder than anyone I know. HATERS GONNA HATE.”

Joy, I love you. Thank you. It’s so true. For many reasons, I shouldn’t be listening to the negatives. I do work hard. I work out every day (or twice) and I am trying to do right by myself, mentally and physically. Which is more I used to do.  Today just wasn’t a day I wanted to hear the haters, because I was actually getting back in my groove.

Let the haters hate. I’m just trying to make sure I am not one of them.